Truth Social to Help Mr. Trump Pay Legal Fees?
Truth Social to Use Imaginative Ways to Help Mr. Trump Pay Legal Fees?
By Pundit Nehru, secretary general of the Philippine-American Society of Pundits, Humorists and Wags (PASPHaW)
Is there truth to the rumor that Truth Social (the Trump's social alleged uncensored app) will soon be selling "Truthbrush" and "Truthpaste" brands? Sale proceeds will reportedly be "donated" to Mr. Trump's Political Action Committees (PAC) that pay the legal fees in defending the former president and alleged co-conspirators from their legal misadventures.
Perhaps Truth Social shall also be marketing later its "Truthlident" denture cleaner and "Truth Mouthwash" brands? And even "Whitening Truthpaste"?
Mainstream press reports say that prior to the arraignment of the third criminal case filed against Mr. Trump, his legal fees have reached $42-million and counting. His PACs will have to raise more, as probably the reported $42-million in initial legal expense is just a "tip of the (lawyers' fees) iceberg," to use an adage.
But "there is no truth (TINT)" to another rumor that Mr. Trump's lawyers have assured their client and his co-defendants that they will never go to prison. How? The lawyers will allegedly use the defense of insanity to stop the trials?
In the meantime, reports say that financial experts suggest allegedly to the judiciary to conduct a bidding for the exclusive television coverage of the trials of Mr. Trump, et al.
Financial whiz kids claim that if the Supreme Court will allow TV access to the trials of the century, it will raise tons of money from broadcasters for the exclusive coverage. Why tons of greenbacks? Because if the trials result in guilty verdicts (or even if some of the accused are sent to mental asylums for treatment), TV coverage (both in North America and in some other 100 foreign countries) will last longer than the Seven Years' War. The government may then use the exclusive-coverage fees to pay for the costs of the trials, incarceration (if found guilty) or psychiatric treatment of the alleged conspirators (if the trials are stopped due to their alleged insanity defense). Any surplus can be used for vacation travels of Supreme Court justices, so that they can avoid criticism for receiving alleged freebies like luxury trips on private yachts from their billionaire friends.
Then bidding can also be done among publishers and movie studios for the exclusive right to print books and do movies about the "trials of the century," if not of the millennium, right?
Will financial miracles cease to happen ...?
Editor's Notes: "Frydays Satires" is geared to fry and roast politicians every Friday. It will be the network's equivalent of "TGIF." Yes, "Thanks, Gridironnuts (sic), It's Fryday."