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Home Columns A Cup O' Kapeng Barako Did the Wrong Eagle Land in Iraq?
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Columns - A Cup O' Kapeng Barako
Thursday, 13 September 2007 04:15

A Cup o' Kapeng Barako

 

The Koran says: "For the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah, and there was peace . . ." But did it refer to the American Eagle? We will discuss the matter of the Eagle at the end of this column.

 

In the meantime, I heard this on CNN (Coconut News Ngayon). Yes, the other CNN, as coined by my fellow journalist, Romy Marquez, of San Diego, California.

TV Reporter: "So, Senator, what have you done for IMMIGRATION?"

Senator: "We have voted to have Alberto Gonzalez deported."

Hey, you can’t call yourself progressive-minded if you ain’t got no sense of humor and you don’t know how to laugh and your face has a scowl and a permanent sour look. Y’all get my drift?

Okey ngarud, now check this out: One early evening inside a typical American family home. Dinner’s just over and the family gathers around a photo album, looking at the photos, remembering what they did this past summer on their vacation trip. The dad said, "… And here we are during our delay at the Chicago airport and there’s us delayed in Denver." And the mom said, "And here’s us during our Newark delay …."

We’re still at the airport.

While going through an airport during one of his many trips, President Bush encountered a man with long hair, wearing a white robe, and sandals. He was holding a staff.

Mr. Bush went up to the man and said, "Aren’t you Moses?"

The man never answered, but just kept staring straight ahead. Again, Mr. Bush, in a loud voice said, "Moses!"

The man just kept staring ahead, never answering the President.

President Bush pulled a Secret Service Agent aside. He pointed to the robed man and asked the Agent, "Doesn’t that man look like Moses to you?"

Again, the President yelled, "Moses!" And again, the man stared ahead and did not answer.

The Secret Service Agent went up to the man in the white robe and whispered, "You look just like Moses? Are you Moses?"

The man leaned over and whispered back, "Yes, I am Moses. However, the last time I talked to a BUSH I spent 40 years wandering in the desert, and ended up leading my people to the only spot in the entire Middle East where there is no oil."

Heee-hawww!

We’re still at the airport … at the Minneapolis airport, that is. It’s 12:45 past midnight, do you know where your children are, I mean, which toilet stalls your senators are in?

A foot tapping: Tap, tap, tap. One, two, three. The tapping foot touches another foot in the next stall. Now we see a hand reaching underneath the divider … waving.

And that hand was the hand of Senator Larry Craig, a conservative Republican from Idaho, who was arrested in June for propositioning an undercover cop in Minneapolis International Airport. According to police reports, Craig tapped his foot against the foot of the man in the next stall and ran his hand beneath the divider. These signals are used by men seeking SEX in public restrooms.

The man in the adjacent stall that Craig waved to was an undercover cop.

Of course, Craig denied that he was gay and that his foot accidentally touched the officer’s because he has "a wide stance."

Really?

That wide?

Oh my.

These goofy GOPS, I tell ya.

Craig is the latest GOP senator that had been exposed with ethical and moral problems. Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska is now being investigated for his "relationship" with a contractor and Senator David Vitter of Louisiana had been linked to a prostitution ring as a "regular" customer.

So, Mr. Bush’s hand-picked commander in Iraq, General David Petraeus, had said this week before Congress that the U.S. military objectives "are in large measures being met" and that Bagdad is now a lot "safer" and that "sectarian killings have declined."

BUT in a poll of Iraqis conducted by ABC News, the BBC and the Japanese network, NHK, 70 per cent of Iraqis said security in their areas and in the whole country as a whole have worsened.

And that about 65 percent said the "U.S. invasion was wrong" and that the "coalition forces should leave now." And that attacks on U.S. forces is "acceptable." Yeah, but never mind what the Iraqis think and say to us.

We’ll stay on course … and kill more of them.

The following verse is from the Koran (9:11): "For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced, for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah, and there was peace."

Wrong! It was no Eagle; it was an Ass! And there was a quagmire!

BTW, did y’all note the Koran’s verse number?

JJ



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Last Updated on Saturday, 24 November 2007 15:13
 

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