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Thursday, 07 May 2009 08:55 |
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Willie Nepomuceno wrote:
Subject: Fw: PINOY JOKES
Date: Thursday, May 7, 2009, 8:07 AM
Pinoy Political jokes of the day.
* Why Did Manny Pacquiao End the Fight So Quickly?
So that dozens of Filipino lawmakers in Vegas could go home early and do their freakin’ job!
* Reports say Metro Manila was almost crime free during the Pacquiao-Hatton bout. The only unlawful acts committed were even seen on TV - the premature electioneering of Villar, Roxas, Lacson, Binay, Legarda, and if you noticed during the bout’s telecast: Teves, Teodoro, and Genuino.
* Manny Pacquiao decked Ricky Hatton in just 359 seconds. The only thing faster was convicted rapist Daniel Smith’s departure when the Court of Appeals reversed his conviction after—and this is a very, very, very, very widely held theory—a year-long under the table [politics, moolah] negotiations.
* Manny Pacquiao finished off Ricky Hatton in just 359 seconds. Yup, it was that fast. The only thing faster was Manny Villar’s denial that he sought two budget allocations for the same C5 road project.
* Manny Pacquiao ended his bout with Ricky Hatton in just 359 seconds. Yup, it was that fast. The only thing faster was Ted Failon’s instruction to his maids to clean up their house when his wife allegedly killed herself.
* Q: What is blue, plastic, has 3 wheels and induces vomiting?
A: Sen. Mar Roxas on a pedicab [his TV ad]
* “OPLAN TULI—MEDICAL MISSION”
Nanay: anak, masakit ba ang iyong tuli?
Anak: hindi po naman, nay.
Nanay: bakit ka umiiyak?
Anak: kasi ang aking titi nilagyan ng tattoo “THRU THE INITIATIVE OF CONG. PROSPERO NOGRALES”
* WARNING !!! Swine flu is spreading. Avoid shaking hands or contact with politicians, specially CONGRESSMEN who have a passion for pork [barrel].
* At St. Luke’s Hospital, spokesman announced they have patient exhibiting swine flu symptoms. But they later recanted saying they mistakenly puled out the file of FG [M. Arroyo].
* MIKE ARROYO is a great supporter of sports.
In fact, he will introduce a new sport: “Heavyweight Kickbacking”
* Modern Economics:
Slowdown-when your neighbor loses his job
Recession- when YOU lose your job
Recovery-when GMA loses her job!
* Paanong malalaman na may
pumasok na tanga sa sabungan?
Pag ang dalang panabong ay itik!
* Paano malalaman na may mas tanga sa sabungan?
Pag may pumusta sa itik!
* Paanong malalaman na nasa sabungan si Mike Arroyo?
Pag nanalo ang itik!!
* Nagbubulungan sila:
Mukha lang daw akong mabait….
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Sa ingles: he’s just good looking.
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