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Jun 25th
Home Sections Humor & Satire Sex, Lice and Videotape (Part Two)
Sex, Lice and Videotape (Part Two) PDF Print E-mail
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Sections - Humor & Satire
Written by Bobby M. Reyes   
Monday, 01 June 2009 10:33

T he articles (written by Jesse Jose and this editor) about the current Philippine sex scandals, as videotaped by a Filipino doctor, Hayden Kho—who documented his various sexploits (sic)—have generated lots of comments. We received also additional tips about the reaction of several parties involved in the controversy and the investigation being done by the Philippine Senate.


  • A reader from my hometown, Sorsogon City, said that there are reports that the beleaguered doctor may decide to hang up his medical practice and just go into business. The reader says that Dr. Hayden plans to team up with Sorsogon City resident, Agustin Lo, and launch a fast-food chain specializing in grilled chicken.  The new company will be called, “El Pollo Mas Lo-Kho.”
  • Dr. Hayden says that after his grilling by several Filipino senators, he can dish out not only grilled chicken but also chicken stories. Like “why did the chicken cross the road to the Philippine Senate?”
  • Then our Deaf Throat, oops, Deep Throat in the Philippine Senate, says that aside from the public hearing there was a private meeting by the Senate en banc with Dr. Hayden. Our contact in the Senate says that the off-the-record session involved questions to Dr. Hayden about cosmetic surgery, especially about facelifts. It seems that some aging senators want to have younger-looking profiles.
  • There were also questions about sex-change operations during the private meeting between Dr. Kho and the senators. It seems that two lady senators want to become men, so that they could be viable candidates for President in 2016 and another senator who wants to become a woman, so that his/her presidential candidacy in 2010 will attract lots of attention, aside from securing the women’s votes. (The woman senators who want to be men say that after President Gloria Arroyo is ousted, the Philippines will never have a woman President again for the next 100 years.) Our Deep Throat says that there is no way to reveal the identities of the senators or else our contact’s scalp will go the way of General Custer.
  • Several members of the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) have threatened not only to excommunicate Dr. Hayden but even also oust him from the church. The controversial doctor says, however, that “once a Catholic, he will always be a CatholiKho (sic) no matter what the CBCP members say.”
  • Another tipster said that former Philippine President Joseph “Erap” Estrada was asked to comment on Dr. Hayden being a Lothario like him. Mr. Erap refused to make a comment. But he said that he has given up gambling and does not buy lottery tickets like the Lotto or for that matter, the Lothario or whatever new Lotto game the lottery officials have introduced. In view of the CBCP threatened expulsion of Dr. Hayden from the church, one “makulit” (obstinate, if not tenacious) reporter said that he would just ask ex-President Erap the denomination of his choice. The former President said that he preferred the 500-peso bill, as it has the face of Ninoy Aquino, whom he greatly admired.
 (To be continued . . . probably . . .) # # # 

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Last Updated on Monday, 01 June 2009 10:37

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