By Goliath Letterman

(No Relations to David Letterman)

Dateline Los Angeles, California, Dec. 28, 2010, Coconut News Network (CNN Kuno), 2010 “Niños Inocentes” Lampoon Edition

T he latest poll surveys found that six out of 10 Americans say that they would definitely not support Sarah Palin for President. We, therefore, surveyed (in an unscientific but informal way) those who did not like to support Ms. Palin.

Here are the top 10 reasons why an overwhelming majority of the people surveyed said (rightly or wrongly) that Sarah Palin would never be the President of the United States or even the governor again of Alaska:

10. Sarah Palin talks in her sing-song voice as if only the Tea-Party people are listening and she dances as if only the Tea-Party folks are looking but people think they are her ticket to the much-ballyhooed 15-minute of fame and fortune.

9. Sarah Palin quit as governor of Alaska after two years of her first term. Winners never quit and quitters never win anything . . . not even in the lottery.

8. She and her surrogate could not even beat Lisa Ann Murkowski for the United States Senate seat of her home state on Nov. 2, 2010.

7. Ms. Palin thinks “foreign affairs” is a love situation or triangle in a foreign country.

6. She is the female version of James Danforth "Dan" Quayle, the 44th Vice President of the United States. But she will not even become a Vice President.

5. Like Mr. Quayle, she cannot spell right “Murkowski” or most-probably even “potatoe” (sic).Or perhaps she spells it "fotatoe," just like she spelled "refutation."

4. Like Mr. Quayle, she thinks that Latin is the tongue of Latin America and “Mexican” is the official language of Mexico.

3. She thinks Murphy Brown was the English nanny of Dan Quayle’s children and that she did not have the work visa.

2. While Ms. Palin is the darling of the “Tea Party,” she does not drink tea and politics is not really her cup of tea. And . . .

1. Even if she can read all right, she does not bother to read the major newspapers in the United States, especially their Op-Ed sections. She finds as a waste of time reading all those liberal-minded columnists. # # #