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May 30th
Home Sections Humor & Satire First Gentleman Revives “Religion-based Diet Evolution” as New-Year’s Resolution
First Gentleman Revives “Religion-based Diet Evolution” as New-Year’s Resolution PDF Print E-mail
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Friday, 02 January 2009 11:12

T he First Gentleman of the Philippines, Mike Arroyo, announced today that he will revive the “religion-based diet evolution” that his wife, President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo, former President Erap Estrada, the Catholic bishops and other national leaders launched in 2001. The First Gentleman is having difficulty maintaining his ideal weight, as prescribed by his physicians. Mr. Arroyo, who had a heart bypass a couple of years back, says that the diet’s revival can be considered the New Year’s resolution of the First Family. The (the forerunner of the came up with a scoop of the “Religion-based Diet Evolution” and published it on April 1, 2001. The article is reproduced in its entirety below.



President Arroyo, Erap and Cardinal Sin, et al, Launch Religion-based Diet Evolution

Dateline Manila, Philippines, April 1, 2001 (Yimby Lampoon Press).

F ilipino political and religious leaders always believe that bigger is better. But that maxim doesn't hold true when it comes to weight. Nearly 90% of all the Filipino lay and religious leaders is considered overweight, according to the Philippine Center for Weight Control and Prevention (PCWCP), and that number keeps on growing.

"Filipino leaders are eating more and exercising less. There's so much food available to the Filipino leaders, their kin and cronies . . . available 24 hours a day, and it's not always healthy food," Dr. Twiggy S. Lim, the PCWCP president, said.

According to a confidential report the typical plate used by Filipino lay and church leaders has grown to an average diameter of 16 inches, compared with a home dinner plate, which is nine inches, if a poor Filipino family can afford at all to buy plates.

Many Filipino leaders - from bishops to business honchos to movie stars, police/military officers and even Muslim and communist rebels - are overweight. There is hope, however, as some of the national leaders are now turning to religion for help. In a conference hosted yesterday by Jaime Cardinal Sin, the archbishop of Manila, at the Cardinal Santos Memorial Hospital in Greenhills, San Juan, Metro Manila, a group of overweight Filipino leaders announced the "El Sadai Crash Diet Program." The El Sadai members meet every Friday night for mutual encouragement and support. They share experiences and talk about how many pounds they have lost, all the time praising God. The El Sadai members have vowed to make all Fridays into days of fasting and abstinence. The group decided to use the Sorsoganon term, "sadai," which means "small," in calling the movement that would not only make Filipino leaders slim but hopefully lead also to the reduction of the budgets in their respective departments or companies.

The "El Sadai CDP", a faith-based dieting plan, hopes to run hundreds of workshops throughout the Philippines this coming Holy Week, Cardinal Sin announced during the conference. Cardinal Sin has been estimated to be overweight by at least 100 lbs.

In a remarkable show of national unity on weight reduction, former President Joseph "Erap" Ejercito Estrada and his successor, President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo, appeared during the conference. Both claimed that they have been on the program for only two weeks and yet both lost 15 pounds each. President Arroyo said that when she felt hunger pains, "it's God telling her it's time to eat."

Former President Estrada, who is as overweight as Cardinal Sin, said, "The faith comes in, in trusting Him to know that He is going to tell me when to eat. And that He is going to tell me when I'm full, and because I'm going to eat the way He has programmed me to eat, I'm going to lose the weight." He refused, however, to deny or confirm if God was telling the former president to drink imported wine together with the food that he had been eating according to the way the Almighty has planned him to eat.

The "El Sadai CDP" is all about eating less - no food is forbidden and there is no exercise plan. Cardinal Sin rejects the idea of some diet gurus to be eating five servings of fruit and vegetables a day. "I don't agree with that because that's not in the Bible," the cardinal said.

That attitude concerns Filipino dietitians, who argue that the only way to lose weight and keep it off is to learn to eat healthier food.

Sen. Juan Flavier worries, however, about the psychological impact of relying on religion. Senator Flavier, a physician, was a former secretary of health during the Fidel V. Ramos administration. He said also that former President Ramos, a Protestant, and his predecessor, Corazon Cojuangco Aquino, and former First Lady Imelda Romualdez-Marcos were set to join the "El Sadai CDP" next week and thereby making the diet program a bipartisan and ecumenical movement.

"If you're not successful on the program you might have a double whammy. You might not be just letting yourself down, but you might be letting your God and the Filipino people down too. So, if a faith-based diet doesn't work for certain individuals, they might find it difficult to accept psychologically," Senator Flavier said.

Despite the criticism, the number of faithful continues to grow. Cardinal Sin says there will be thousands of success stories - because once people see how the "El Sadai CDP" changed the life of former President Erap, not just by losing weight, but by embracing Christian ideals in every way - the diet plan would become an overnight national fad and sensation. The cardinal said that this "diet evolution might just eclipse the now world-famous EDSA people's revolts in February 1986 and January of this year as the biggest triumph of the Filipino people."

President Arroyo on the other hand commented that many program members who have struggled with their weight say that the "El Sadai CDP" is their last hope. They believe that, through God's will, they can get better bodies, resulting in better frames of mind and more efficient public service. She said that she might issue a presidential executive order mandating Filipino public officials from cabinet members - like Education Sec. Raul Roco and Local Government Sec. Joey Lina, who themselves are overweight by about 40 pounds each – to the members of the police to join the "El Sadai CDP." Perhaps the President said that the Philippines might adopt the national slogan of Italy, "il piccolo é bello," which means, "small is beautiful." UNQUOTE. # # #



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Last Updated on Tuesday, 22 December 2009 23:59

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